Columbus was a hook-nose, kosher-eating Jew, and everyone on the in knows it.

He sold himself as a Goy to get the cash for travel. That and his want to avoid the systematic ethnic cleansing project I was running at the time. Really, do you think a non-jew could have arranged all that financing?

His wife was generally a baleboste, but her continuing kvetch pushed him from mentsh to a mishegas. Hence it was that yenta what inspired Columbus to get as far away from her as possible. It was hiding from her the yiddisher kop found the new world.

Keep On Chemtrailing,
The Boss